Dear Abe’s Peanut, a Wednesday Advice Column

25 May

I’m a mom so I subscribe to A LOT of newsletters that give parenting advice. I’ll share the good stuff Wednesdays. Here’s some edited from Positive Parenting Solutions:

“Instead of using rewards – use encouragement! Encouragement motivates children from the “inside” and helps them feel capable and empowered.

Replace rewards (stickers, candy, money, treats) with encouraging statements like… “Wow, you are really growing up!” “You become more and more independent every day.” “You must feel proud of how much you can do for yourself now.” “It must make you feel good that you worked so hard on…”

These types of encouraging statements create and sustain internal motivation. With external rewards, the motivation for the behavior stops as soon as the reward goes away, fostering the “what’s in it for me” attitude.”

Oprah spent 25 years helping adults learn self-love and empowerment (I just watched her final episode) — makes me think if we work on encouraging rather than rewarding our kids, they might feel empowered from the get-go.


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